The last few days I have been at work by 6:30. When you add in the fact that my commute is 90 minutes, that's pretty freaking early. A lot of folks have asked me about this, so I figured I'd share the reasons I'm here so early.
10. I get better fuel mileage without all those assholes in front of me jamming on their brakes
9. If the sun was up I would have had to clean my sunglasses and it’s just this whole thing
8. Think of all the time it saves me having the parking spot right by the door
7. I’m just plain crazy
6. This way I can explain my looks by a lack of beauty sleep
5. The only way to get fresh eggs is to get here at 6:00 AM
4. If I get up too late I wake up grumpy, if I get up real early and am quiet she stays asleep
3. This way the gym is empty. Admittedly I just walk by on my way to the caf anyway, but if I wanted to I could easily get on a machine
2. what the hell I had to pee anyway
But the real reason I’m in here so damn early is
I find it much easier to convince myself to go to work when I’m still drunk from the night before
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