Fuel mileage tips

I was pretty psyched to get 50+ MPG the other day and I know some of you asked me for some of my mileage tips, so here are the top ten tips for driving that get you better mileage…

1. AC hurts gas mileage, open windows hurt gas mileage, doing both is just stupid.
2. Coast to a stop light when it’s yellow or red. Running it will save gas, but the cost of the ticket will be enough to make you wish you had just stopped for it.
3. If someone cuts you off you lose momentum and thus get worse gas mileage. The best you can do is flip them off and chase them down until you can get them back. It won’t help your fuel mileage, or Karma, but you’ll probably feel better, unless of course they pull out a gun and kill you.
4. Start off slow from a stop. This is actually quite hard when some asshole is beside you revving the engine though.
5. You can’t get good mileage listening to “Hair Nation” or “The Boneyard”, but hey “Rock On”
6. I know you may think you are Johnny Q. Rapper, but more “Junk in the trunk” hurts fuel mileage. Take all that crap out of the car, and let’s be honest, laying off the donuts wouldn’t hurt you either fatty… (For more diet tips ask me about “The Casselberry Diet”)
7. Overinflating your tires can help your fuel mileage since less tire surface on the road means you can coast more. It also means you can’t turn very good, chose your poison, good mileage or staying on the road.
8. Drafting behind a large truck can help gain some MPG’s too, at least the “Mythbusters” say it does. I’m a big fan of grappling hooks instead. This way you get good mileage and don’t need to steer. Of course you have to make sure you hook on to someone going the right way. Last time I tried it I ended up in Ohio and no one wants to go there….
9. Braking hurts mileage. If possible coast to a near stop. Don’t be stupid though if you need to use them, use them.
10. I know you may think all those extra belts under the hood probably put more drag on the engine and removing them may seem like a good idea, but some of them go to wicked important things like water pumps, alternators or other mechanical crap that you really need. Unless you know what they hell you are doing stay out of the hood. (Same thing if you live in Roxbury by the way)…