ten more ways to tell if you are from maine.

10. You’ve used an outhouse and not found it “quaint” or odd.
9. If you have ever traded pelts at Kittery Trading Post for “supplies”
8. If you have ever gotten in a fight over how to split a roadkill moose.
7. If you have ever had to snowshoe to the gas station
6. Going four wheeling and going to town are the same thing
5. You have a favorite brand of chainsaw
4. You have ever raced a skidder
3. You “pop on over” to Canada to use the bathroom
2. You’re car emergency kit contains a shovel, a backup shovel, tow rope, blankets, boots, food, water and one of them new fangled, cell phone thingies

And the number one way to tell you are from maine

You’ve read all of these and thinking ayuh he’s right…..

Top ten ways to tell if you are frome Maine

Top ten signs you could be from Maine
10 You have a gun rack….. in your convertible
9 You ever bought a motor vehicle with rolls of change
8 You can tell the difference between hail, sleet, freezing rain by the sound they make
7 You drive more miles on your tractor than your car
6 You have ever walked through Canada as a shortcut
5 You pronounce Augusta and Bangor like Auguster and Bangah
4 You have ever looked at a license plate to decide which directions to give someone who asks
3 You have more than one spare tire, and a tow rope in your vehicle….just in case
2 You have a spare truck in case your good one gets stuck in the ditch

And the number one way to tell if you are from Maine

You ever sold something you found on the beach to a tourist

Things that make you wonder

If you want to lose twice as much weight, can't you just eat both weight watchers and nutrisystem?

I know stay at home moms have it hard. I mean they do all the housework, cook the food, raise the kids. It really is a full time job. I get it, but why do they get so mad when you give them a performance review?

Sort of makes you wonder.....

“Honey, cheer up, just because you can’t touch your ankles any more at least soon your boobs will”. Even if it's true, don't say it. In fact especially if it's true don't say it.

and one final thought for the day.....

Relationships are hard. Guys, we think we are being helpful but we aren’t. My ex-wife was an animal lover and said she wanted to be buried out back with the pets. Being a nice guy, I decided to surprise her and went out back and dug a hole. I was three feet down when she came out
“What the hell are you doing? I meant when I died, are you a complete idiot?”
“Nope” I replied, “just a wishful thinker” and that’s when the fight started...

Geek pickup lines

Geek Pick-up lines

10. You're even prettier than the girl on my screensaver.
9. My Mom will love you.
8. Wanna use my wifi connection?
7. Yeah I'm a producer. I've got my own youtube channel
6. Can I get a picture with you for myspace?
5. Will you be my Facebook friend?
4. If you give me your cell phone number, I'll make your blackberry vibrate.
3. You know, I have 3G.
2. Hey baby, wanna follow my tweets?

and the number one geek pickup line.....

You're so hot you make my Iphone want to explode in my pants.

iphone blues

Sung to the song smugglers blues by Glenn Frey. In case you don’t know the song... http://www.mtv.com/videos/glenn-frey/256466/smugglers-blues.jhtml


There's trouble on the LAN tonight, I can feel it in my bones
I had a premonition that he should not swap his phone
I knew iphones were deadly but I didn’t think they’d kill
his 3gs exploded and the blood began to spill
So baby, here's your ticket, and the suitcase in your hand
Here's another sim card, now do it just the way we planned
block google voice in twenty countries, Jobs’ll pay you twenty grand
I'm sorry it went down like this, but someone had to lose
It's the nature of the business, it's the iphone blues

Blackberry and the treo, the envy and the bold
The coverage and the deadzones, and the things that make you cold
Don’t matter about the appstore, cost or where you be
You’ve got to get an iphone if you are an EVP
There's lots of shady characters and lots of dirty deals
Every name's an alias in case somebody squeals
It's the lure of itunes music, it's got a very strong appeal
Perhaps you'd understand it better listening to my songs
It's the ultimate enticement, it's the iphone blues

You see it in the headlines, you hear it every day
They say google will top it, but it doesn't go away
They screw you with their contract and sell it in their stores
They roll them out as cellular and man it's here to stay
It's propping up the governments in China and here too
You ask any wireless, man, they'll say there's nothing we can do
From the office of verizon right down to me and you
Me and you
It's a losing proposition, but one you can't refuse
It's the politics of wireless, it's the iphone blues